Lawyer's Wedding Night

 

A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced ten husbands. On their wedding night, she told her new husband, "Please be gentle I'm still a virgin."

"What?" said the puzzled groom. "How can that be if you've been married ten times?"

"Well, Husband #1 was a Sales Representative; he kept telling me how great it was going to be.

"Husband #2 was in Software Services; he was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he'd look into it and get back to me.

"Husband #3 was from Field Services; he said everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn't get the system up.

"Husband #4 was in Telemarketing; even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver.

"Husband #5 was an Engineer; he understood the basic process but wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.

"Husband #6 was from Finance and Administration; he thought he knew how,  but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.

"Husband #7 was in Marketing; although he had a nice product, he was never sure how to position it.

"Husband #8 was a psychiatrist; all he ever did was talk about it.

"Husband #9 was a gynecologist; all he did was look at it.

"Husband#10 was a stamp collector; all he ever did was.... God! I miss him!!!

But now that I've married you, I'm really excited!"

 "Good," said the lawyer, "but, why?"

"Duh! You're a lawyer. This time I know I'm gonna get screwed!"